Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Same Kind of Different All Over Again


Elias continues to astound me with his differentness. I keep thinking we've just about seen all a baby can dish out, only to be proven wrong over and over again by Sir Elias. It's truly not that I'm arrogant about the whole baby thing. It's just that we've obviously been through this before, so we're starting to feel comfortable with the process. But comfort, experience, and know-how just don't prepare you for what inevitably occurs. Different.

Take yesterday, for example. I'm washing dishes and Elias is sitting at my feet cooing, burbling, and just having a grand old time playing with his fingers. I mean, why play with one of the dozens of educationally beneficial and Dr. Toy Award Winners available when you have ten fingers at your disposal? So, anyway, I hear the telltale gurgling noise of Elias filling his diaper with something a wee bit solid, but still mostly runny. I glance down in time to see a gurgling Vesuvius exuding from the top of his waistband into a lava-like flow which ran down his backside, pooled onto the floor beneath him, and continued into a semi-circle around his posterior. That was a new one for me. And, for the record, ew.

We have Jumperoos, Exersaucers, & Baby Einstein DVDs galore. And don't forget the above mentioned toys which have been carefully selected based on their color hue, relative quiet play, and country of origin. Does any of this interest Sir Elias? Not really. He loves a small, wooden circle hand carved out of maple with a blue, painted bead attached to a rod so that it makes a "clacking" sound as it is being shaken. And he would be lost without his swing, a Fisher-Price Aquarium Cradle Swing purchased off Craigslist for the bargain basement price of $35. Elias wouldn't really notice if the rest of the baby gadgets, paraphernalia, and must-have items were swallowed up by the great-gullible-parents-of-a-baby monster, who simply takes these hardly used items back to the store for restocking in order to be purchased by the next pregnant sucker.

We didn't even waste our energy and money on a stroller. Elias thinks strollers are the spawn of Satan. Which, incidentally, is how he feels about anything which requires a seat belt. The only exception to this hard and fast rule is the car seat, which he recently decided is a great place to be since everyone else in the van seems to be in the same predicament. Instead, we have two Ergo Carriers which Scott and I use to pack-mule both Elias and Abigail around in. I keep watching Craigslist for a Bob or Chariot Double stroller even though there is a nagging question in the back of my mind saying: "Why?"

The most baffling difference for our Elias is his complete and utter lack of a schedule. He has no schedule. No routine. Nothing, absolutely nothing predictable. All of our other children settled into a comfortable rhythm right around 3-months old. Elias is 8-months and literally just goes and goes and goes until suddenly, he crashes. And sometimes he'll be out for 2 hours and sometimes he'll be out for 20 minutes. You never really know what your day is going to be like with this Little Mister in tow.

My productivity levels are at an all time low. If I can't do it with one hand while cuddling the almost 20-pounder, forget it. I work crazy hard to get all important two-handed jobs out of the way before bedtime for the older kiddos. Typing is a slower one-handed process, but still doable. Mending Scott's scrubs definitely requires two hands, so it gets done during the day. Since Elias rarely chooses to crash before 10:00 pm, which is incidentally about the time I am ready to crash, many of the projects which were handily accomplished "after family hours" now find themselves either going undone or being crammed into our regular day.

I know this is all temporary. I know that before I can blink, Elias will be wrestling with all the other boys. I know that Scott and I will look back on our Early Life with Elias and fondly "Remember When" sooner than even seems possible.

Perhaps that is the only predictable dependability about a little one. How fast the time does go.

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